April 15th will forever be a big day.
It’s been four years since we started this project. Four years ago we closed on this house, and within one week were were taking sledge hammers to the walls. It was messy back then and somedays it’s still messy now, but I still wouldn’t go back, even on the really messy and hard days. It’s a material thing, building a house, but it doesn’t just leave you with a material thing in the end. I don’t care who you are, what your project is, remodeling, big or small is a mental thing as much as a material thing. It exhaust you, energizes you and challenges you, but you usually come out stronger on the other side.
Looking back though the hundreds of pictures it reminded me of all of the different stages of our project and of all the work behind us that is so easy to forget in day to day life. There is no doubt we have a lot of work to go, but we’ve hit the top of the mountain and were on the way down at least. Some projects we think may take a few weeks, turn into months and other tasks take no time at all when you expected it to be a long struggle. Everything takes time and patience.
We wouldn’t be where we are today without the help of Chase’s parents, my Dad, my mom, sister and stepdad, some good friends and a lot of support from people just cheering us on through the years. It’s a lonely stage of life some days, and support lifts your spirits more than you can imagine sometimes. The bottom line is that this project wouldn’t be possible without Chase’s mind, his will and his determination to never give up. He can still remember where spare logs came from, and measurements from two years ago. He pushes me and teaches me every weekend, and I’ve watched it try to break him somedays, but his determination never quits and I fall even more in love with him for it.
I didn’t expect this to be part of our story for so long, but it’s molded us in so many ways already. We’ve been working on this house for almost half of our life together, weekend after weekend. I know it will never really feel done, no house ever does. I don’t do it enough, but somedays I’ll walk through the yard or will be looking out the window and think about how we will someday live out everyday life here, and that life will feel just as busy as this remodel life does. I hope we can appreciate the slowness of life on those days, and appreciate the time we spent working to get there. I hope we can be thankful for those lessons and memories with each other. The way we had to lean on each other and be each other’s sounding board and therapists somedays, or that we had to remember to not take the stress out on each other, and that we’re gonna keep failing at that part and remember to forgive each other.
I tried to put together a collections of some of the pictures over the years and the website finally cut me off. Not all in perfect order but the general way things happened.
until next time.
Selene // Hand Hewn Living